Today I didn’t start off very good. This feeling started to creep in yesterday evening already. Now I know that it was because I started to doubt myself and my own writing. I’ve always thought I was a bad writer due to comments I’ve heard throughout school and due to my light dyslexia. This is something I’ve always struggled with and that’s actually one of the reasons I started this blog – so I could find my own voice in text. I might not be a good writer in the ‘classical sense’, instead I put a lot of emotions into what I write. For me that’s the only real way to write. My sister is a very good writer and yesterday I was at a point where I basically had put all the writing on her for our project. I didn’t believe that my words could contribute to our project. This thinking was happening on a subconscious level and this morning when I felt completely blocked, they finally surfaced.
My vibration was on a much lower level due to this. It also resulted in me attracting things on a lower vibrational level. This night I dreamt about my ex boyfriend and how I had made the ‘biggest mistake of my life‘. When I checked twitter I saw an entrepreneur giving advice to other entrepreneurs, one of them was to ‘never trust that money will come easy’ (awesome advice to get a Monday morning).
I realized that I couldn’t start working with this vibrational frequency, so instead I took the dogs out for a walk. I met a homeless guy who gave some food to the dogs (so so sweet!) and a quick course in how to sit and lay down. Lol. When I met my sister again I finally got talking and I realized my block. I might be emotional in my writing and I might not be a writer in the ‘classical sense’, and all that is OK. It’s just my own fear that is blocking me.
So, now I’m at Starbucks with a large cup of tea and an empty Word document. Now for the coming hours – it’s just me, my thoughts and my own words.